Samaria Maria Colbert


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Mental Health And Ministry

Posted by Samaria Maria Colbert on December 6, 2018 at 11:10 AM

Mental Health And Ministry Let’s Talk About It

By: Samaria M Colbert MSW LCSW


There is an increase in awareness of the need for mental health treatment within the church and secular world. Unfortunately, it is not until tragedy strikes that we begin to understand the complexities of the human condition and how mental illness must be addressed in a more affective way. In 2018 the world was awestruck when designer Kate Spade was found dead in her home. It was reported that she had been experiencing depression for many years. Within days Anthony Bourdain, celebrity chef, author, travel documentarian was found dead from an apparent suicide. The church has not been immune to this epidemic. According to a 2015 article in Christianity Today, they reported that 1,500 pastors leave the ministry every month. According to the Schaeffer Institute, 70 percent of pastors constantly fight depression, and 71 percent experience burn out. Most recently a beloved pastor committed suicide. The church can no longer dig their heads in the sand and ignore those who suffer with mental health conditions.


As a Christian licensed therapist I am increasingly aware of how what I do as a practitioner means so much. I was recently asked “how does counseling fit into the ministry of Christ? ” Here in lies the answer to what mental health and ministry is. The ministry and mission of Jesus Christ is mental health and ministry.


Isaiah 61:1-3 (NKJV)

The Good News of Salvation

61 “The Spirit of the Lord God is upon Me,

Because the Lord has anointed Me

To preach good tidings to the poor;

He has sent Me to [a]heal the brokenhearted,

To proclaim liberty to the captives,

And the opening of the prison to those who are bound;


2 To proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord,

And the day of vengeance of our God;

To comfort all who mourn,

3 To [b]console those who mourn in Zion,

To give them beauty for ashes,

The oil of joy for mourning,

The garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness;

That they may be called trees of righteousness,

The planting of the Lord, that He may be glorified.



If you look at the language that Isaiah used to explain the mission of Christ it shows us that His assignment was also to bring wholeness to those who had mental health conditions. Look at the wording; “Broken hearted” He wasn’t just referring to those who have a physical heart condition. “Captives” He wasn’t just referring to those who were being held physically captive. When you experience psychological warfare you are being held captive in your mind. Mourning is a form of depression. A spirit of heaviness is a form of depression. So all along from the beginning, the mission of Christ was to help those who experience emotional, mental, spiritual and physical captivity.



Typically the church has used this healing scripture to focus on physical healing but God always had a plan to all along.



When we talk about mental health and ministry therapist simply, integrate our clinical knowledge and scripture foundations to treat mental health conditions. In my study as a clinician, I have found that most mental health interventions were founded in the Bible. Philosophers and theorist, who are known as the founders of mental health treatment removed the ministry of Christ because most of them were not believers in Jesus. Therefore most secular mental health strategies although helpful can only maintain your symptoms, not break cycles. Holy Spirit and the finished work of Christ should be incorporated into treatment. A mental health treatment that doesn’t incorporate healing of the soul and spirit doesn’t work. We are now no longer separating the lines between your mental health and your Christian beliefs. Healing is found in Christ Jesus and through the ministry of counseling. If you would like to be referred to a Christian based mental health therapist www.psychologytoday.com is a great resource. Look for Christian based therapist who have the following credentials behind their name, LPC, LCSW, LICSW, PsyD. If you are a practitioner who would like more information on how to be trained in integrative counseling strategies go to my website at www.samariacolbert.com.



About the Author:


Samaria M Colbert is a licensed therapist, author, entrepreneur. She is the owner of a private practice, Kingdom Creative Counseling a Christian mental health practice dedicated to assisting individuals to recover from trauma and mental illness. Samaria also offers training and resources to Christian based mental health practitioners who want to learn integrative strategies to implement into their own counseling practices.



www.samariacolbert.com

www.kingdomcreativecounseling.com



Samaria M Colbert © 2018




To Forgive Or Not To Forgive

Posted by Samaria Maria Colbert on August 14, 2018 at 11:55 AM

To Forgive Or Not



By: Samaria M Colbert


Luke 23:34 (KJV)

34 Then said Jesus, Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do. And they parted his raiment, and cast lots.


Immaculee IIibagiza survived the Rwandan Genocide. In 1994 there was political unrest and ongoing tensions between two tribes the Hutu and Tutsi. The tension led to the murders of thousands of the Tutsi tribe. Immaculee family was one of the many who became victim to these crimes against humanity. Immaculee’s entire family was murdered while she and seven other women hid in a small bathroom for three months. Immaculee went on to write a New York times bestselling book entitled, Left To Tell and Led By Faith.

Eventually Immaculee did meet one of the murderers face to face where she told him that she forgave him.

Forgiveness is defined as to cease with resentment, bitter or anger towards someone that has caused a great offense. It means to grant pardon. It means to let go of. It means to not hold oneself or another hostage over the offense or offenses.

Forgiveness also means to release, and to pardon, towards another. It means to not carry the wrongful acts, done to us in our yesterday into our today, to impact our tomorrow. Forgiveness is the emotional and spiritual act of wiping away the hurt, pain, and turmoil.

Forgiveness is the conscious act, and deliberate decision to release feelings of resentment or vengeance towards a person or group who has harmed you, regardless of whether or not they actually deserve your forgiveness.

Forgiveness is not earned, it is granted. Forgiveness is a decision. Forgiveness cannot be forced upon you. Forgiveness can be a hard concept for any individuals to conceive of. Most people can’t really conceive of why you would forgive someone who has hurt you particularly with some of the tragic things that are recently going on in our nation.

Forgiveness is the divine order of God. The only way we have access to the kingdom of God next to salvation and sanctification is forgiveness.

The reality is whatever the offender has done, holding it in your heart, mind and spirit will not help the situation. It will not make what happened go away. It does not hurt the offender. In fact in some ways it empowers them. For some the offender knew the intended damage it would have on you and it still has power over you, their intentions were malicious. When you continue to hold on to it you are giving them the power in your heart.

You can have unforgiveness in your heart towards a dead person. Unforgiveness impacts the mind, the will and the emotions. Unforgiveness creates a broken, damaged and emotionally wounded heart. The reality is there is no recompense in unforgiveness. Recompense is compensation or reward given for loss or harm suffered or effort made. You can’t reap the reward of wholeness and a healed heart when you don’t forgive.

First let us begin by looking at what scripture has to say about forgiveness.

Romans 5:8 (NKJV)

8 But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

1 John 1:9 (NKJV)

9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

John 3:16 (KJV)

16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

The first thing about forgiveness is that it originated from God Himself. Man did not come up with the idea or principle of forgiveness. The kingdom of God is all about love. Therefore strife, division, dissention, ill will, hurt, bitterness, anxiety, death and destruction do not exist in the kingdom. These things came to exist as a result of the first rebellion in heaven and the sin that Adam and Eve committed in the garden.

Man was introduced to these concepts that never existed prior. God never had to ask anyone for forgiveness, because He never did anything wrong. Satan is the one who rebelled and committed the first sin, not Adam and Eve as some imply.

The devil was the worship leader in heaven. He decided he didn’t want to be the worship leader he wanted to be worshipped. Even in heaven the only being that was ever worshiped was God. Satan decided that He wanted to be God. Many people imply that satan wanted to be like God, no that is not true. Satan wanted to be God Himself. If your heart is truly for the Lord, you want to be like Him. That was not satan’s motive. He wanted admiration, and worship. He desired power, prominence and position so he pursued it by any means necessary. There was a big revolt in heaven and the devil deceived many of the angels. He was evicted from heaven, and his angels. Now he still wants to be God, however he will never. My point is satan committed the first sin. However to date he has never asked for forgiveness, never repented and he has never admitted that he was wrong.

However after satan did what he did, sin entered into existence. It was Adam and Even who introduced sin to earth. Now we are all born into sin.

So everyone is in need of the savior Jesus, and we need to confess our sin, in order to be forgiven.

Psalm 51:5 (KJV)

5 Behold, I was shapen in iniquity; and in sin did my mother conceive me.

Because sin is in us, everyone at some point in their lives has committed a sin, most of us many sins.

Romans 3:22-23 (NKJV)

22 even the righteousness of God, through faith in Jesus Christ, to all and on all[a] who believe. For there is no difference; 23 for all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God

We all have a sin conscious. It means to be aware, to be pulled, lured or enticed by a sin or wrong doing. Sin simply means to act, think, practice or display behaviors that are contrary to the word of God. It means to act unrighteous, and to do wrong.

We read Romans 5:8 that says Christ died for us when we were still sinners. Meaning Christ made the ultimate sacrifice which was death to atone for our sin. Atone means to make amends. Before we thought to ask for forgiveness, He went ahead and died. We hadn’t asked for forgiveness, felt sorry for what we had done, or thought that we did anything wrong He died.

He didn’t just die for Christians, He died for the entire world. Meaning Christ decided to forgive us of what did before we did it. He decided to forgive us before we asked it. Now that is the powerful thing about forgiveness. Even now you can forgive someone without them ever acknowledging that they offended you.

We forgive because we are forgiven.

 

 

Ephesians 4:32 (NKJV)

32 And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you

When you claim to be a Christian you are making the proclamation that you have been forgiven by Christ. You have confessed Him as Lord and savior. However we all have had incidents where we have had to ask for forgiveness to one another. The reality is we error in one way or the other, whether it be intentional or unintentional. Sometimes you can have the right motives but go about it the wrong way. Sometimes you were just wrong and had to humble yourself admit it and move forward. Think about a time you offended someone. Clearly you had to go back to that person and ask to be forgiven. We all have, that is a part of human nature.

The reality is if you don’t forgive others, God won’t forgive you.

Matthew 6:14-15 (NKJV)

14 “For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 15 But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses

Remember I said that in the kingdom of heaven things like bitterness, envy, hatred, unforgiveness don’t exist. The only way to enter the kingdom is to repent of your sins and ask Christ into your heart. However you can’t gain access to this kingdom with these things in your heart. The kingdom is the most powerful entity that exists. To be able to seek, obtain entrance to this kingdom, you need to first meet the requirements. Since the first requirement is repentance, if you don’t meet the requirements you don’t gain access. You can’t take these negative emotions into the kingdom. So if they are present your access is denied.

God will not hear your prayers if you don’t forgive. I know it sounds harsh considering some of the things you have been through but the truth hurts.

Matthew 18:21-35 (MSG)

A Story About Forgiveness

21 At that point Peter got up the nerve to ask, “Master, how many times do I forgive a brother or sister who hurts me? Seven?”

22 Jesus replied, “Seven! Hardly. Try seventy times seven.

23-25 “The kingdom of God is like a king who decided to square accounts with his servants. As he got under way, one servant was brought before him who had run up a debt of a hundred thousand dollars. He couldn’t pay up, so the king ordered the man, along with his wife, children, and goods, to be auctioned off at the slave market.

26-27 “The poor wretch threw himself at the king’s feet and begged, ‘Give me a chance and I’ll pay it all back.’ Touched by his plea, the king let him off, erasing the debt.

28 “The servant was no sooner out of the room when he came upon one of his fellow servants who owed him ten dollars. He seized him by the throat and demanded, ‘Pay up. Now!’

29-31 “The poor wretch threw himself down and begged, ‘Give me a chance and I’ll pay it all back.’ But he wouldn’t do it. He had him arrested and put in jail until the debt was paid. When the other servants saw this going on, they were outraged and brought a detailed report to the king.

32-35 “The king summoned the man and said, ‘You evil servant! I forgave your entire debt when you begged me for mercy. Shouldn’t you be compelled to be merciful to your fellow servant who asked for mercy?’ The king was furious and put the screws to the man until he paid back his entire debt. And that’s exactly what my Father in heaven is going to do to each one of you who doesn’t forgive unconditionally anyone who asks for mercy.”

A parable is a story that represents the kingdom of God. Hopefully you are seeing the point. One servant owed a great deal of money, but pleaded for forgiveness. Yet he would not bestow that same mercy to another, even though he owed a greater debt.

When a person does not forgive the greater issue is that they are prideful. Pride will keep you out of the kingdom of God.

Luke 17:3 (NKJV)

3 Take heed to yourselves. If your brother sins against you,[a] rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him.

Forgiveness is not, not standing up for yourself. The scripture above means if your brother offends you still rebuke him, meaning let him know about it. Rebuke means to express sharp disapproval or criticism of (someone) because of their behavior or actions. Then it says forgive him. So often we confuse passiveness with forgiveness. Forgiveness is not allowing people to take advantage of you, all in the name of being a super Christian.

However the scripture means after you confront that person about their behavior, move on by forgiving them. There is a different between forgiveness, denial and repression. Denial means to deny or act as if the offense never happened or does not exist. Repression is to suppress or push down what you truly feel. Remember I said forgiveness can’t be forced upon you. When people try to force forgiveness on you it either fits in the category of repression, oppression or denial.

When you pray, God won’t hear your prayers if you have unforgiveness in your heart towards another.

Matthew 5:23-24 (NKJV)

23 Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, 24 leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.

God won’t receive your offering if you have unforgiveness in your heart towards a brother.

Remember our Father in heaven forgives. In fact while He was in the process of being murdered He forgave.

 

 

Luke 23:34 (NKJV)

34 Then Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do.”[a]

And they divided His garments and cast lots.

Jesus knows what it is like to be humiliated, abused, misused, misunderstood, beaten, and wrongfully accused. Yet He forgave.

Forgiveness is not easy; most people don’t hold grudges over simply offenses. Often times it is the person closes to you that will hurt you the most. No matter how hard it is, remember it is possible.

We make the decision to forgive, Holy Spirit does the work. There are some sins against humanity that are simply unbearable and unthinkable. There are some offenses that without the presence of the Holy Spirit we will never overcome, due to how emotionally damaging it can be.

However without forgiveness there is not true repentence.

The definition of unforgiveness is simple it means, to not forgive. It means to carry the weight of yesterday’s hurts into our today. It means to carry the heavy burden of resentment, bitterness, anger, rage, hurt, turmoil, fear, violence and hatred, because of someone else’s offense towards you. It means to carry resentment

To forgive means to let go of the heavy burden of resentment, bitterness, anger, rage, hurt, turmoil, and fear.

Which one do you want? You can never have peace, with unforgiveness in your heart.

Finally a quote by Kagen Salmansohn, “Forgiveness is a process. Forgiveness is not approval of the offender’s wrong doing. It is not viewing what they did as less harmful than it truly was. And it’s not about giving the offender a “free pass” to keep on doing wrong actions against you. Forgiveness is about recognizing that staying in resentment creates an “active echo” of the pain the offender caused. By saying that the awful offense is “beyond forgiving” you give them continued power over you. Forgiveness begins with the mind recognizing that there’s truthful logic in how the past cannot be changed, but happily the present and future can be. Eventually forgiveness progresses to the heart with the heart deciding it will no longer allow the offender’s pain to take permanent residence in your heart. Yes it is a process, but eventually the mind and heart together recognize that the choice to forgive is both logical and spiritually liberating.

Forgiveness doesn’t excuse their behavior. Forgiveness prevents their behavior from destroying your heart. Quote by www.beyondordinary.com


Signs You Need A Therapist

Posted by Samaria Maria Colbert on August 11, 2018 at 7:25 PM

You need a therapist if...

1. Your BFF is selective about answering your call because you have been talking about the same thing for years with no resolve. You are emotionally draining.


2. Other family and friends are not answering your call but your chronic issues are also emotionally draining for them. They are to nice to tell you so. They love you but can't deal with you.


3. You self disclose to early when meeting someone new, they were so weirded out they don't deal with you any longer.


4. You have chronic feelings of sadness, worry, depression, anxiety that won't go away on it's own
.


5. Facebook is your place to "vent" your emotions.


6. You either isolate from people to much or you attempt to get close to people to soon in a way that makes them feel uncomfortable. (Healthy boundaries)


Talking to a therapist is NOT the same as just needing someone to talk to.

Only one yes to the list means you need a therapist.

www.kingdomcreativecounseling.com





 


Pastors, Christian Leaders Should Be Honored

Posted by Samaria Maria Colbert on August 11, 2018 at 7:10 PM




Pastors should be honored not disrespected.


1. If you are not a pastor you have no business telling a pastor how to do his or her job, just as you wouldn't tell a neurosurgeon how to better effectively do his or her job if your were not one.


2. God put leaders in position as in every organization you have some man appointed leaders, but still the position itself is godly and should be honored.


3. Disrespect due to disagreement is NEVER an appropriate response. Even on social media, most people post on social media what they would never have the nerve to say to some to their face. Consider what happened to Miriam when she talked about Moses. He was not even in the room. Most are seeking validation in their opinion not change.


4. God is in control. The church as a whole although flawed has produced more successes, saved more lived, delivered more people from hell, and birthed more leaders in all areas of influence, then any other organization that has existed since the beginning of mankind. The church is to be honored. Name a organization that has that kind of power or those bragging rights. I'll wait...........................


5. Instead of criticizing how about you pray and read your Bible. Most of the time your opinion in NOT BIBLICAL. God sent Moses, Joseph, Daniel, the prophets, David before he was King to stand and speak to Kings. And the list goes on.... Today's culture doesn't change biblical standards.


6. People always criticize what they don't understand. Just because you don't understand it doesn't make it wrong.


7. Myth the church is NOT struggling and IS growing in power and might. If you don't see it consider attending a different church that ministers to you.


8. The church is the bride of Christ. Christ died for her. Now just like any married man would have a problem with you disrespecting his wife so does God. Keep at it and God Himself will respond to you. Don't say you haven't been warned. Pastors are apart of the bride of Christ.


9. Consider contributing to make the kingdom better. You can criticize others into your place of greatness and prosperity.


10. When was the last time you prayed for your pastors. There is a demonic attack against, pastor's, Christian leaders and church as a whole. Carnal people always respond carnally but spiritual people go to God.


I could go on. I said it before I have an amazing church with an amazing pastor that loved the church hurt away. I love my church and the universal church as a whole. Even if you are a pastor and I have never met you know that as a mature Christian I and many others like me are praying for you.


These are my wisdom points based upon scripture. If you disagree that is your right however I do NOT debate the word, even though you're girl is well versed and could. Any inappropriate comments will be errased immediately.


GET RID OF DISTRACTIONS

Posted by Samaria Maria Colbert on August 8, 2018 at 2:10 PM


Distraction is anything that takes you off of your purpose and assignment. This is why when you meet someone new friend or potential mate. They must be clear about their purpose and assignment. If they are not or cannot articulate who they are and what they are working with leave them alone.


Wisdom: The truth of the matter is there are people who have established so called ministries that are really rooted in demonic agendas.


These ministries really spread gossip, discord about your latest, "Christian celebrity, christian ministry, Christian church or Christian no name." These ministries are run by someone with title prophet, pastor xyz but when you listen they are nothing more than a lipstick alley for those claiming to be Christian.


Symptoms that an individual is a part of this ministry is that they are consumed with the lives of others. They spread gossip, rumors, discord and divisions. They say it is all in the name of "discussion" but when you listen clearly and discern, you know what is really being said. Again these ministries are really rooted in a spirit of pride, division, arrogance, discord, gossip, strife, jealousy, envy but claiming to be Christian.


You CANNOT be satisfied with YOUR life, YOUR Purpose, YOUR assignment, YOUR relationship with Christ, when you are consumed with the life of others. Just because someone's life doesn't line up to your expectations doesn't mean it is not of God. (as long as it doesn't contradict scripture)


Mind YOUR business is not meant to be smart but it is really a ministry that will get you all the way delivered if you allow.


GET RID OF DISTRACTIONS. Don't drink the tea.


Other distractions:


• Anger and Unforgiveness (offenses)

• Expectations of other people. (they expect you to take care or fix a situation that God has not called you to.

• Procrastination: Assignments are time specific.

• Trials and tribulations-Romans 8:35-39 (KJV) 35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?


Look again at what tends to distract people from pursuing God’s best, tribulation (great trouble or suffering), or distress (extreme anxiety sorrow or pain), or persecution (hostility or treatment especially because of race, religion or political beliefs), or famine (lack or extreme scarcity of food), or nakedness (to be exposed, vulnerable), or peril (serious or immediate danger), or sword. (threats, destruction, violence)


• Depression, and anxiety.

• Lack of discernment will get you distracted.

• Complaining.

Samaria M Colbert © 2018


Letting Go Of Offense

Posted by Samaria Maria Colbert on June 27, 2018 at 10:10 AM

Letting Go Of Offense 



I have learned sometimes you really have to separate people from their actions. It sounds strange but often times we get offended (at least I have) because of how someone treated me not understanding that they had pure motives but they went about it the wrong way.


I have also learned that often people's actions towards you has nothing to do with you rather their own insecurities. They are broken in someway and your presence triggers their own pain and feelings of inadequacy. Even though you never felt anything negative towards them, their actions are a reflection of how they feel about themselves.


Learn to forgive. Yes you can still hold people accountable and rebuke them in love. Yes you can and in some cases should have a conversation about what will not happen should you be in my life in the future. Yet forgiveness is always the answer. Reestablishing communication may not always be.

Prophetic Dream: Mental Health Ministry

Posted by Samaria Maria Colbert on June 27, 2018 at 10:05 AM

Prophetic Dream about mental health ministry.


About two weeks ago I had a dream that I believe represents those of us who are embracing and operating in mental health ministry. In the dream I was sitting in a church and a young lady was in the front getting ready to giving her testimony. As she is in the front of audience I see her getting very nervous. She gets so nervous she starts hyperventilating to the point where she looks like she is getting ready to pass out. It looks like she is having a heart attack. A group of people from the church run up to her including myself and the ordained ministers. I am the only one who reaches her and they disappear.


I say with authority, "you are having a panic attack." I then lay my hands on her back and say, "I rebuke the spirit of fear off of you."

 

I believe the dream is indicating of how God is birthing us as Christ counselors. There was no mistake that I was able to get to her when others couldn't. Or that I was able to determine right away what it was. The others thought she was having some kind of health condition and again she looked like she was having a heart attack.


I don't share my dreams often and am careful what I post on social media believe it or not. However I believe the dream also meant how God is moving in the church in regards to mental health ministry. There are some emotional,spiritual, and mental issues that will not be addressed by church due to the lack of knowledge, they are also not equipped to address. Traditional ministry can't properly assess or treat this.


God is raising you up, right from the pew. God is birthing you and me into greater realms of mental health ministry. We are the answer, we have been called, appointed and anointed for such as time as this.


When they say, "where is the church?" Again, God has already provided the answer. God is moving!


BTW: I know there is a greater interpretation for the dream but for the sake of time and discretion.


Be encouraged saints! God is up to something. I believe everything not seen will be seen shortly. Whatever business, ministry you have in the mental health ministry arena God is getting ready to birth it in greater realms with a great outpouring over your practice. Your going to see supernatural increase. God is allowing the world to expose certain things in the mental health world so that this ministry begins to come forth in exponential ways. Your getting ready to see great increase in your business, your books, your training programs, your curriculums that are mental health and ministry related. It is going to happen suddenly.


Be encouraged! I only shared that dream because it wasn't just for me but for others that are like me and do this kind of ministry.

Singles Only

Posted by Samaria Maria Colbert on June 27, 2018 at 9:55 AM


For single women...as a therapist I often have to say the same thing to different clients.


1. If a man is truly interested in you he WILL pursue you. If he is not pursuing you take the hint
.


2. If a man half pursues you leave him alone. Remember Christian women Ahab wants a wife to, regardless of how unfit he is to be a husband. If he expects you to be the man and him to be the woman and you are not in a relationship, it doesn't get better from there. Save yourself wasted time and energy.


3. Your are enough!!!! You do not have to change, dumb yourself down, minimize your success, or play yourself small in order to say you have a man. The man that God has for will be able to lead you, cover you and protect you. Your success will not deter a real man who is not intimidated by you.


4. There is no such thing as a man over thirty who is "just shy." That is the excuse woman use to excuse a man's behavior.


5. Sex outside of marriage, living with a man that is not your spouse is not of God. Masturbation, inappropriate sexual touching, oral sex is still WRONG outside of marriage! Holiness is still right!


6. If you are over 30 you have to date with a purpose at this point you are not interested in dating to "see where things go". Either this is going to head to marriage within the next 6 months to a year or you are not the one and you are wasting time. State what you want up front, if they don't want the same thing LET THEM GO! You don't have time to waste to see if they will change their minds.


7. You need to understand what your vision, purpose and God's plan is for your life is. They need to articulate what their vision, purpose and God's plan is for their life. If they can't articulate it, don't know where they are going, and can't have a decent conversation, saying something other than "what are you doing?" Let the go! You are wasting your time.


8. Standards, expectations and boundaries. Say it with me, "standards, expectations and boundaries." One more time say it again, "standards, expectations and boundaries." One more time for the people in the back. (ok just kidding, no I am not)


9. Remember everyone doesn't have good taste. Common sense is not so common. Stupid is as stupid does. Never forget these words of wisdom.


10. People often look good on paper. They can sell you a mirage, but looking good on paper and being the whole truth are two completely different things. Rachet comes in all different shapes, sizes, titles, positions, and dispositions. Don't be deceived by what you see.


Bonus: Let God lead you. Repeat, "let God lead me."

Psalm 37:23 (KJV)
23 The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord: and he delighteth in his way.
Psalm 37:4 (ESV)


4 Delight yourself in the Lord,
and he will give you the desires of your heart.


God will give you the desires of your heart. If he is not your hearts desire. Keep it moving.
Pick up my book: Worth The Wait
“A woman’s heart should be so hidden in God that a man has to seek Him just to find her.”
It is okay to guard your heart.


Proverbs 4:23 (NIV)
23 Above all else, guard your heart,
for everything you do flows from it.


I am convinced that a lot of heart ache, pain, and wasted years could be avoided if we simply guard our heart. When someone gets in your heart it is hard to get them out. Have a guarded heart versus having walls up they are two completely different things. Walls come as a result of hurt. A guarded heart is a result of being clear about who you are in Christ, again there is a difference. When a man is truly interested in you, He will pursue God first to inquire about you. God is your over protective Father. He will either approve or deny access. You have a responsibility to guard your heart until you hear from God and until He seeks God's favor for your heart.


NEVER FORGET IT!


Radio Interview With Samaria M Colbert by Prophetic Expressions

Posted by Samaria Maria Colbert on January 23, 2018 at 12:40 AM

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10 Entrepreneur Lessons I Learned in 2017

Posted by Samaria Maria Colbert on December 14, 2017 at 12:50 AM




So here we are in just a mere 19 days left, and we will say goodbye to 2017. A new year is coming. I have grown, matured and learned so much as an entrepreneur I thought I’d write a short blog about it, okay maybe it won’t be so short but go with me.


This year was an incredible year of growth and development for me. Don’t get me wrong it hasn’t come without it’s challenges, but in everything I have gone through I continue to be amazed at the faithfulness of God.



This year some of my dreams became a reality. My business is no longer housed in my home office, or in my portable portfolio. This year after many years of looking for just the right space we are located in a beautiful space in downtown Greensboro, overlooking a great view. If you knew the story of how I got it, you’d praise God with me. This year my writing career went to another level, I wrote and completed more projects than any other year. I will spare you the details but trust me I am just in awe of the magnitude that God allows me to produce. When His hand is on what you do there is no stopping you.



So like I said this year has been a great year of growth, transformation, and strength. I can end this year on a positive note, I am so grateful for the journey. I thought I’d blog ten things I have learned about being a Christian entrepreneur. Of course, there are more than ten but for the sake of time let’s stick to 10. They are in no particular order, and in everything I do I will never leave out my love, Jesus Christ, without Him nothing would be possible.



The value of time. One of my sayings is that I value my time like I value my money I am very careful who I spend it on. I am a woman that is driven to pursue purpose on purpose. If there is one thing, I have learned about myself as an entrepreneur that is I have zero tolerance for people who waste my time. I have concluded this year if an individual is not pursuing purpose like I am and if they cannot articulate themselves, if they call me to talk about nothing, I have no use for them. I am not mean, but I value my time, I am not going to waste it doing nothing, with purposeless conversations. I know that may sound mean to some of you, but that is my truth. When you have a vision that you are actively working, you don’t have time for purposeless people who are sent to distract you from the assignment.



Connections- This year I finally decided to be careful about connections. Just because someone is supportive of your vision doesn’t mean they are capable of actually helping you to fulfill it. You can love someone with all your heart, but the reality is they can’t go where God is taking you and believe it or not that is okay. That’s one of the life lessons God has had to teach me over and over again.




Sacrifice. I knew entrepreneurship took sacrifice, but this year I have sacrificed so much more than I did in years before. For example today, I drove to one of my offices that is an hour away, then drove back to my downtown office in Greensboro for a consultation. The entire time I just wanted to go to my home and go to bed. I get to my downtown office, and the client decides she would rather do the consultation over the phone. Yes, I was slightly annoyed by this, I didn’t have to drive back an hour just to meet with her, I could’ve have just called her. Then I turned and drove another two hours to get to a two day training (a training I am not looking forward to by the way.) My point is today was a sacrifice. An entrepreneur spends time, up before everyone else, staying later then anyone else, all pursuing the vision. Often it doesn’t feel like work because you enjoy what you do, but today it felt like work. I am exhausted, but I needed to add content to my website so after I got to my hotel I started this blog, plus I can’t let a good idea go to waste.



Insurance, insurance, insurance. Yes, I am a therapist in private practice, so navigating and learning insurance has been quite challenging but you know what I learned a lot. It is not as frustrating as it was at the beginning. There is a learning curve.



I learned never invest more into someone else's vision than they are willing to invest in themselves. I push myself hard, so when I connect with others to complete their work, I push them just as hard. However, I learned I couldn’t want it more for them then they want it for themselves. I learned to let go.




NO! NO! NO! I have learned to say No! No! I can’t just talk to you over the phone “just to talk” I am a therapist, so when you say “I need to talk.” What you mean is “I need to see a therapist I just don’t want to acknowledge a mental health diagnosis, I don’t want to come to your office, I don’t want to sit down and talk because I don’t want to acknowledge my mental illness.” Christians have such stigma when it comes to mental illness; they don’t want to call it what it is. If you are not my mother, my sister or my friend, but you need to “just talk” what I interpret that is, you are wanting to be my client without acknowledging it as so. Feel free to call my number, set up an appointment for an IN OFFICE counseling session, otherwise NO! I will not be “just talking” to you.



NO! I do not offer FREE services. I heard it said that people don’t respect you when it’s free. Yep! I learned this one the hard way. By the way, I have had people call me and ask me to write entire books for them for free, consult with them for free. Ummm NO! It takes time to write a book, particularly the kinds of books I write. No, I don’t just throw together a pamphlet I mean a book overnight. I take time, do my research and make sure the book is industry standard. I learned that people that continue to ask for free services don’t respect or value you as an entrepreneur. That may sound strange, but my bills are not free, my office space is not free, my office supplies are not free, the upkeep of my license to practice is not free, my websites, marketing material, book cover, editors, etc. all of that is not free. My time is NOT free. Don’t ask!



Walk with confidence. I got the confidence lesson a couple of years ago, but this year I learned confidence to a greater degree. My pastor told us a few months ago, people may not talk about your progress, but they will see. I would like to add people won’t believe in your vision until they see results. No one believed in me, but God when I started out over twenty years ago I was a broke college student who just wanted to graduate from college. Now they see the results. I don’t do what I do for people, but I realized a long time ago I had to do what I did unto God not to please people.



My life principle is never to pursue people. I live by this; I pursue God. This year I stuck to my guns. If someone doesn’t see my value that is their problem. Everybody can’t see the difference between a cubic zirconia and a diamond. It is not your job to convince anyone of who you are; it is your job to be what God has called you to be.



Ultimately Christian entrepreneurship is not meant to seek financial stability; it is not to seek a house or a car, it is not so we have the accolades of man, although those are great benefits when you become a success. Christian entrepreneurship is really about seeking to advance God’s kingdom, His way. When I think of advancing God’s kingdom, and that He would use me I am only grateful to God for choosing me.

Matthew 6:33 (KJV)

33 But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you.


My advice to all entrepreneurs, as God told me, seek right living, seek to advance God kingdom through His methods. Let us let go of self and pursue Him at all cost. Be blessed and go forth in Jesus name.

Samaria M Colbert © 2017



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