Samaria M. Colbert
So here I am. I was asking the Lord what I should write about next and , "I hear true beauty". Writing is therapeutic for me. I love to write. I am going to be a New Yorks Times bestselling writer you wait and see. I am not bragging, not lying or prophesying I am simply telling the truth. I don’t care who does or does not believe in my dream. I write because that is what God has put in me to do, not because I want to be seen. Being a writer among other things is who I am.
So I decided to write about True Beauty. I find myself again growing and maturing in many different ways since I started my weight loss journey. I am again proud to say that I am 100 pounds lighter and steady working towards my goal. I don’t have too much further to go. But with this kind of transformation comes change. Changes that I never have experienced. I now love to shop. I mean I love to shop. Did I say I love to shop? Life for me is life on a budget. I am a bestselling author I just haven’t been released yet to the manifestation. (LOL) Seriously though. But never the less I am a beauty on a serious and I mean serious budget. I relish in going into my favorite store. I have a love for all things feminine and beautiful. I love lotions and sweet smelling fragrances. I love dressing up, wearing high heel shoes. Something I never could do before I lost weight. I love and I mean loooovvvveeee to wear my favorite color purple. Purple makes me very happy. Just thinking about purple makes me smile uhhhh purple. I probably wear purple more than I should. As much as I love purple too much purple is a bit much. But I don’t care it’s my world and I want as much purple as I possibly can in it. It is silly but if I could get away with wearing purple every day I would. I am in my right mind so no I don’t. With this new found freedom I am discovering my true beauty. I look in the mirror and think I am beautiful. No I am not bragging this is from someone who use to be afraid of the entire world and thought she was ugly. Well that is a lie the devil told me that I don’t believe anymore. Yes I am beautiful. I don’t think I am better than anyone else, but it feels good to feel beautiful in my own eyes. Yes I have been delivered. You may think I am beautiful, you may not. Frankly I don’t care. I know who I am. My Father (Jesus) calls me beautiful so therefore I am.
I also love makeup. Boy do I love makeup. I love to wear it, of course I am beautiful without makeup. I make the makeup it does not make me. I love to where jewelry. Since I am on a budget I wear the costume jewelry but I love it. Life is good. Of course filled with ups and downs but life is life. When you feel good, you look good. Shopping makes me smile. I always remember that real transformation happens from the inside out, not the outside in. I love to smile. I love to look in the mirror and think man I could never wear this before. I could never wear heels. I feel like a real woman. Uhh Umm a Saved, Sanctified and Holy Ghost filled woman I should ad. Something’s just should never be. So with my new Saved, Sanctified and Holy Ghost filled wardrobe comes confidences and assurance. With confidences comes a beautiful smile that comes from way deep within.
But real beauty is not in the clothes you wear, or in the car you drive it is knowing who you are in Christ. A few weeks ago after I went shopping, I am feeling good. I think man I am really going to look great in everything I purchased. I remember before going to sleep saying, “Thank you Jesus for blessing me.” As I was sleeping I hear the Lord say, “Man judges by the outward appearance but I look at the heart”. Man was that an ear full to me. I know exactly what the Lord meant. I guess in my own subconscious way looking good and dressing better made me feel more beautiful. It is so amazing how God will just speak a word to you that is so simple but makes you feel so safe. I felt so safe in His arms when He said that to me.
It is true to some I am now beautiful and to some I am not. Who cares? But Jesus saw me as beautiful while I was 100 pounds heavier. My heart has always been towards God. I love Him so much my heart get overwhelmed with His love at times. But His reassurance that He loved me and saw beauty in me when no one else does only makes me realize how much I love Him. And why I love Him.
All my life I have been forgotten and over looked. I don’t look anointed but I am. I may not dress the best. I am may not be the right size but God sees me as beautiful and always has just as I am. My heart is pure. God has and continues to transform me in so many ways. It is His reassurance that I am beautiful in His eyes that only makes me love Him more and more.
You see although it feels good to shop, wear high heel shoes, wear makeup, to wear sweet smelling fragrances and lotions. Those things don’t make you beautiful in God’s eyes. Being the right size doesn’t make you beautiful in His eyes. That’s why the good Lord’s created Spanks and Body Shapers. Having the most perfect skin tone, eyeliner, and hair mean nothing to God. He really does look at the heart. When He decided to bless you He is not looking at what you wear or the outward appearance of worship He looks at the heart. It is your heart that makes you trust worthy enough to having the blessing released to you. And no saying, “Well God knows my heart”. Is not an excuse to keep sinning. God knows if your heart is for Him or not. He knows when your heart has turned from Him. Others may not but He does.
One thing I love to do now is look through the fashion magazines. I love looking at the latest fashion trends. Most of which I wouldn’t wear by the way. My favorite fashion era is the 50’s. I love the pencils skirts and pearls. I love the idea of pretty skirts that actually went beneath the knee. Something in my opinion we need to revisit. I feel like saying to some of those celebrities. Put some clothes on. God created clothes for a reason. If He wanted you to walk around naked He would have made it so that Adam and Eve not clothe themselves after they sinned. Everything is not for everyone to see. Some things are meant to be between you and your husband not the world. For those Saved, Sanctified, Single young ladies such as myself something’s just needs to be kept between you and Jesus.
As I look through the magazine I see celebrities that are outwardly beautiful. When they walk the red carpet you hear screams ohh and ahhhs. I am not knocking folks but some of the people who are the most beautiful on the outside are the most insecure and unhappy people on the inside. Some of the most outwardly beautiful people do some of the ugliest things. I was flipping through the channels one day. I happen upon this reality television show. There were women on there who were so beautiful. One in particular was just jaw dropping gorgeous. But as she opened her mouth some of the ugliest, nastiest words came out. I quickly flipped the channel to another station. Part of being a Christ like beauty is knowing what to feed and not feed your spirit. I remember thinking man she is too beautiful to act so ugly.
The point is True Beauty comes from the inside out, not the outside in. I may never be beautiful to some. I will keep evolving and changing into the person God has me be. I may never experience certain things. You may look at me and never give me a second glance. But my beauty comes from within. God saw me as beautiful when no one else did. He has turned my ashes into beauty.
So I say to you what God said to me, the next time you down yourself for not being the right size, or not wearing the clothes. For whatever reason. If others around you think you are ugly. Tell yourself man may judge me or forget about me because I may not look anointed to them. But God looks at my heart. He sees me as beautiful just as I am.
Remember you are beautiful. God is using the transformation process to perfect your character, give you discipline and perfect your motives but you are His already and He sees you as beautiful right where you are.
I am a true beauty because my real beauty comes from within.
Ecclesiastes 3:11 (NKJV)
11. He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also He put eternity in their heart, except no one can find out the work that God does from the beginning to end.
He had you hidden for a reason but your day of unveiling has come.
Samaria M. Colbert © 2011